Busy-ness Isn’t Making Us Happy
In 1930, economist John Maynard Keynes argued that capitalism will eventually generate enough societal wealth that many people will have access to a quality of life that doesn't require a full 40 hours of work per week.
The trend is showing him to be correct.
“How are you?” “Busy!”
Whenever I ask anyone, "How are things going?" they answer, "Busy!"
In full truth, some people answer that way just to stay at a superficial level. But many say it as a badge of honor (it's cool to be busy!), while others are truly experiencing such a level of busy-ness that it is at once a cry for help, a confession, and the only way they know how to summarize the quantity of information that they are dealing with.
We never produce enough to satisfy us, and we are always chasing more work, bigger paychecks, and larger homes in better neighborhoods.
The expectation that there will be happiness once we achieve or have enough is a trap, says Arthur Brooks, a behavioral social scientist who studies happiness.
Having More X Is an Empty Promise
As we achieve more and acquire more, the brain chemical dopamine gives us a "hit" that makes us feel good. But, Brooks says:
Dopamine is a liar.
Dopamine claims that "if you get an achievement it will last forever." When the achievement comes, the good feeling evaporates, and our attention turns to the next achievement to give us our next "hit."
He claims that the world makes 4 promises of happiness, all of which are empty:
Money will make you happy.
Power will make you happy.
Fame will make you happy.
Pleasure will make you happy.
And judging by how busy we are, an enormous chunk of the population buys into these lies.
What is the solution?
It requires a shift away from fixating on what we have. These questions consume us and make us crazy, pursuing more achievements and having more things:
Do I have a nice enough car?
Do I have a substantial enough investment portfolio?
Do I have a luxurious enough vacation?
Do I have a position in a company that allows me to make big things happen?
The Fastest Path to Increased Happiness Is to Manage Our Wants
Instead, we should manage our wants. Brooks simplifies this into a simple equation:
If we decrease the volume of our wants, the denominator grows smaller, and the ratio of haves to wants becomes closer to 1.
What does managing a want look like? It comes from a clear understanding of our values and an ongoing, daily evaluation of how the choices you are making are connected to those values.
Values are crucial to the happiness equation above.
For example, if you know you value connection with others, and yet you notice you are giving up dinners with friends and time with loved ones in order to get ahead at work for the possible payoff of a new promotion, your "want" of power and/or money doesn't match your "want" of connection with friend and family.
The more wants you have, the more they will compete with one another, and the more painful – impossible, even – it will be fit them all in.
Clarity of what we value helps us reduce our wants and achieve a quality of life that is available more now than ever before.